Recharging the Batteries

Let's chat about taking a break. In case I haven't mentioned it, I am the "Stresschat Mama"(to be read with a James Brown voice instead of I am the cause of stress:)). Clients come to me with various issues that cause them stress. Our brains are not wired for chronic stress and if we don't take breaks periodically from the stresses, we get ill.
I decided to practice what I preach so we went to a cottage near Parry Sound called Whisperwood. It sits on 91 glorious acres of pine forest and has it's own private lake. I had forgotten what night looks like and what quiet sounds like.
We snowshoed, hiked, watched a million DVDs, cooked wonderful food and slept.
One morning, I got up early to let the dog out and the snow was lightly falling through the pines. It looked like miniature crystals floating towards earth.
If you ever find your way near Parry Sound, check out the cottages. You are in for a true rest.

A Celebration of Life

Let's chat about celebrations.Yesterday I attended a celebration of life for a man I never knew. I knew his sister and wanted to support her.
We are a loss denying society. We focus on getting things and acquiring stuff but we rarely talk about loss and death.
Clients are embarrassed when they start to cry remembering the death of someone close. There is this silly "rule" that after 3 months, we are supposed to be over the grief. This is very wrong.
I tell my clients that once you have experienced a death, you will always feel the wave of emotion and grief. Sometimes it will feel like a ripple and other times, like a tidal wave. What to do? Ride the wave.
The man's name was Albert and I got to know him yesterday. I saw a slide show of his childhood and growing up years. He was an avid sky diver and jumped around the world.(all his sky diving buddies were there in formation). He once worked as a trader at the TSE and he practiced Buddhism. His sister told us he was kind and gentle man.

Since I know my daughter reads my blog, here is my request.I have decided when it is my time to cross over, there will be no funeral broo-ha-ha ( as Mom would say) Nope not for me. Quick service with immediate family and then about 2 weeks later a giant party. Caterers, music, drinks the works. I like the idea of celebrating a life. Thanks Jeanne.


Now...as someone once told me"every day above ground is a good day"- go and enjoy!

Anxious Annie

Let's chat about anxiety and panic attacks. First, let me emphasize that anxiety is always about the fear of losing control. It is one of the most treatable and manageable emotional states if you consult with someone for the right tools and strategies. Here are some of my tips.

There is a six step approach to self-control when dealing with an anxiety attack.

Recognize that you are feeling anxious. Accept your body feelings as a symptom of your anxiety and a sign that something is bothering you.

Try to figure out what is really bothering you. Is it some type of conflict that you don’t want to deal with? Is it a scary thought? Is it a ridiculous expectation you have of yourself? How about the T.V. program you watched last night? What is bothering you?

Give yourself permission to feel anxious about whatever it is that is bothering you. "Of course I feel anxious because…"

Use positive dialogue to talk yourself through the anxious time. It will pass. Examples may be, “It’s just anxiety. It will go away. I will not lose control. I can still go about my business. It won’t hurt me”

Get busy. Do something to release some of this self-induced stimulation. Your body is like a car in 5th gear with the parking brake on/ don’t just sit there. Distract yourself from the way you feel.

To see a little humour in the way you feel. You feel weird but you don’t look weird.

It takes time and lots of practice. The only way to stop fearing panic and anxiety is to experience them. Then work your way through them and begin to see that they won’t hurt you.
There is no need to run. You are your safe place and your safe person. You can make yourself feel better.

Wilson

Let's chat about pets and balance. Some of you may have heard me talking about our dog Wilson. Besides being a great companion, I am training him to be comfortable in the office. Most clients love having him around and he senses when someone is upset. He gently sits by their feet and just is.

He has this capacity to just be rather than do- something we humans need to learn. We are very busy doing and spend little, if any time in quiet contemplation which is essential to remaining balanced.

Clients often ask me how I remain balanced. Let me tell you, it's taken a long time to get a handle on that and sometimes, it still slips away from me. Here are some of the things I do and maybe you will get some inspiration. Monday mornings I take Boomer Yoga with Leslie Landry. It's a gentle flow yoga that is geared to people 45 and up.
Throughout the day, I take mini breaks where I do some deep breathing and quiet my inner self.
I listen for sounds and stop the monkey brain.
On the weekend, we go for a hike in the woods, either along the Bruce Trail or the conservation areas.(Crawford Lake is a personal favorite-very spiritual place)
I take courses that expand my professional knowledge and just fun stuff. This weekend I am doing a workshop on vision boards.
Taking Wilson for walks and playing with him is just fun.
Finally, I don't take myself too seriously.

Let's chat about the shift in attitudes since the recession. As an active member of the Burlington Chamber of Commerce,www.burlingtonchamber.com I attended a presentation focusing on the economic trends for 2010. Ray Kong from Ipsos.ca gave a presentation on the new trends and attititudes for 2010. If you go to their website you can subscribe to their trend watch newsletter.
The 4 key trend words in business and with the consumer are:prudent,careful,value and safety.
Gone are the days of the "extreme razor". Scotia Bank caught on to this by selling optimism" you're richer than you think". The LCBO changed "Don't drink and drive" to "arrive alive".
P.S. If you are a business owner in the Burlington area, check out the Chamber. The committees are a vital part of the business community and it's a great way to contribute and make a change.

If it is to be, it's up to me

Trust Yourself! The truth is in there

Let's chat about intuition...that nagging little voice that says "yup..sounds good to me" or"stand clear and run as fast as you can!" The mystery is, why do we ignore it. Why do we think out intellects are smarter than our guts?
Our North American culture values intellect over all else and yet, the opposite is the truth. If you look back on your life and truly asked yourself about the good and bad decisions you made, you may respond by saying" I knew that all along".
There is a physiological explanation The gut is also know as our "second brain" and has more seratonin than the brain. Hmmm... so the brain takes in all the cues- words, body language, aromas etc. and sends them to the gut which sends the message back to the brain.
Don't ignore your gut feelings.

On Line Counselling Lets Off Some Steam

http://www.thespec.com/News/Business/article/706180

Thanks to Rosie-Ann Grover for a great article in the business section of the Spectator